The Perfect Soldier's Daughter Shouldn't Cry
by Mezzy-Ku
Summary: The Gundam Pilots are older now, some married with kids. When peace is shattered once more, will they be able to save the day again? Even without their Gundams?


Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing. I don't, ok? I don't!! You can't sue meee!!! Oh, and the characters that **I** made up may not be stolen, ok? Enjoy!! By the way, have a kleenex handy for the end^-~

The Perfect Soldier's Daughter Shouldn't Cry-By Mezzy-Ku

            A sunny day. That's the kinda day it was when it happened. I was lying in the park with my best friend, Jesse, when the bomb exploded. At first we thought that there was an earthquake, then that they were blowing up a building downtown to make room for another building. No, it wasn't either of those two things, that was clear when the only building affected by the blast was the preventer's base. The same place where my mom worked and was at that exact moment.

            My mom, Relena Dorlain, is the vice foreign minister at the preventer's base. I always knew that even though she stood for peace, she was almost constantly trying to be assassinated. My parents tried to convince me when I was young that I was just paranoid and no one wanted to kill mommy. That is, until _I was almost assassinated, then they figured there was no use in lying to me. I've had a body guard with me almost all the time since then. My dad doesn't have the same problem, no one would have the guts to even try to kill him. That's right, my dad, the perfect soldier, Heero Yuy._

At the time I had no clue of his past. I heard that he was a soldier when the war was still going, I had no clue what part he played in the war. I always guessed he was some low ranking soldier who should have been higher ranking. I never would have guessed that he was the pilot of one of the Gundams. He never talked about his past to me, and I decided to just not ask.

            So as I looked in the direction of the preventer's base it occurred to me that it finally seemed someone had succeeded in making it past security. They were good. Too good. The security was of the highest technology available at the moment and made it impossible for anyone without access to the base to get in unnoticed at all. There was no way a bomb could have gotten in. I stood there wondering what had happened, barely breathing in the park, thinking of all possible ways a bomb could have gotten in. There's no way, it couldn't be done. Unless…

 Hey!! C'mon, aren't ya gonna come with me to go check out what happened? I mean, wasn't your mom in there? Oh, I'm sorry!! You must be feeling terrible right now, and here I was babbling on…so, are you alright?" 

I turned my head suddenly in surprise. I forgot I left my friend standing there. There was major concern in her eyes, the rest of her face showed it, too. Jessica Sylvia Maxwell, my best friend since we were both drinking out of bottles and having our diapers changed. Her parents were Duo and Hilde Maxwell, both friends of my parents since they were all much younger. I always thought she looked so cute, with her big blue eyes, almost the same as her mothers, and her heavy, purple bangs hanging over her face. She used to have her hair in two long, braided pigtails until she figured she'd grown too old for pigtails and cut most of her hair off except enough to keep in a small pony tail. She wasn't really that tall, a little shorter than me, but I wouldn't consider her small. She was also pretty tough, many boys have kissed the dirt as a result of her fist locking with their jaw.

I remember hearing her say once that her dad used to have hair longer than her in one long braid. After hearing that for the first time I was on the floor laughing for about five minutes straight, then I caught my breath and laughed for another two more minutes. The mental picture of seeing Duo with long hair always made me want to crack up laughing. That's what Jesse would do to cheer me up, she'd mention just that. 

So there she was, giving me a sympathetic, puppy dog face and hoped I wasn't taking the explosion too hard. I was, my emotions hadn't surfaced yet, but they would. As my insides started falling down on each other, I knew soon my outsides would give way, too. The fact that my mom was caught in the explosion, meaning almost certain death, just made my stomach turn. I figured I might as well answer her.

"Ya…ya, I'm fine, I'm great." I said, not a single true word in my statement.

"Oh, sure, I know you too well. You're lying. So you wanna go check this out, or what?" Jesse said and already started to head towards the building.

I followed behind her, trying to keep up with her rushed pace as well as my Jell-O legs could. My limo was waiting for me at the edge of the park. Jesse and I hopped in. 

I remembered when I first got this limo, Jesse and I would ride in it for no reason at all except to enjoy the comfort and the mature feeling the limo held. Now, I didn't care for the leather seats or the build in TV, I just wanted to get where I was going and fast. 

 "I'm guessing you want me to take you to the preventer's base, or what remains of it, Miss Dorlain." The chauffeur said as I nodded.

I was never quite sure of what my last name was, there seemed to be too many choices for one person. Dorlain, Peacecraft,  or even Yuy. Most of the time I was just called by the name Dorlain, sometimes Yuy, and very rarely Peacecraft. 

I sat back in the overly comfy chair and tried to make my mind sort out all the thoughts that were swimming through my head. My mom was dead, that was the main thing in my head. The main thing I just wouldn't believe. The preventer's base had just been blown up. Someone had somehow made it through security, somehow. My world, my life as I knew it was slipping through my fingers and all I could do was drive up to the already ruins of the preventer's base.

Fifteen minutes later we finally arrived right outside the pile of burned lumber and twisted metal. I got out of the car with Jesse right behind me. My dad and her parents were already there. She leaped away from me and fell into her mother's arms where she and her mother started to cry out 10% of their bodies natural fluid. Her dad wrapped his arms around both of them to try and comfort them. Probably it was just to make them stop all the noise, though. 

I turned to my dad, he was still looking at the building. I moved closer towards him and then he turned towards me. I knew he wasn't going to open his arms and let me fall into them, let me cry out all my emotions that were plaguing me. That's the way he was, the way I'd always known him. He never showed any emotion, he always kept the same mask on. But that was alright, I didn't expect him to comfort me, so I didn't care. Right now I cared about the matter at hand. I kept my emotions suppressed and held my head high. 

So, what happened?" I asked simply, waiting for the answer I already knew was coming.

"A bomb went off right in the center of the building." My father said, answering just what I asked him. Not bothering to add the details that I was waiting to hear.

A swallowed a few times and then asked what I had wanted to know since I knew a bomb had gone off. "Is anybody…have they found anyone that has survived?" I choked out.

My dad turned away from me, I'm guessing he didn't want to look me in the eye, "A few people have been found that didn't die…yet. They all had severe wounds, though."

So not everyone died, that's what I figured, or at least, hoped. That was enough to give me just a sliver of hope; it gave the smallest chance that maybe…maybe my mom didn't die, after all. She could still be in there, waiting to be rescued. Maybe she was already out and taken to the hospital. Or just maybe my dad turned away from me to help him hide what he knew I didn't want to hear. The only way to be certain was to ask. "Do you know if, maybe, um, mom's all right? Or alive at least?" I felt like a fool asking that to my dad.

My dad paused for a minute and looked  up at the top of the ruins that was once the preventer's base. He then answered me without turning his head back in my direction, "She was on a higher level of the building, probably. Even if she did survive, she'd have fallen quite a bit and then been buried in the ruble. The rescuers are searching for all survivors, just wait and see."

So that was the answer to the question. The big question that meant everything to me. The answer was just, "Maybe, probably not." And it came from my own father, the one person you'd expect to give the ray of hope. Even if he didn't believe that she would be alright, he could at least help me think that she might be. I didn't know what it was exactly at that moment that made me do what I did, it could have been the fact of knowing my mom's fate. That maybe my best friend was getting more comforting support. Or maybe just that it seemed my dad didn't care, but I started to burst out crying. Something that I've learned to so rarely do.

I used to when I was little and fell or got hurt somehow. Then I remember my dad would scoop me into his arms and try to wipe away all the tears he saw and then he would say, "No daughter of mine should ever cry." He always said it as if there was something else he wanted to say or add to that statement, but never did. So I learned from that that as long as he was my father, I should never cry. Maybe that's why my emotions didn't always show when they should have, I always learned that I shouldn't show them. Between my mom's serious face while in meetings, and my dad's emotionless mask, I was raised to think that emotions were something not to be shown. The only thing that kept me seeming like a normal teenager was my best friends constant emotional face. If she was thinking something, you could read it right off her face. I guess she rubbed off on me more than I thought.

So there I was, crying like a baby right in front of my father. He pulled my arms away from my face and looked me straight in the eye. He shook his head slowly and I knew that I had to stop crying right at that moment. So that's just what I did. I pushed all of my emotions deep down within me. I wiped away my tears and looked again like my normal self. 

For a faint second when my dad looked straight at me, I swear I could see sympathy in his eyes. Maybe he was feeling the pain that was caused by his wife's sudden death. Maybe he was feeling.

*                        *                        *

It was the next day, I had stayed over at Jesse's the night before and with some convincing, so had my dad. My mom was found in all the wreckage, and to my pure joy, was also still alive. Unfortunately, she was a wreck. I barley even recognized her under all the blood and ripped skin. She was rushed to the hospital and was taken to critical care. I waited at the hospital with my dad, Jesse and both her parents for hours, but my mom never came out of the critical care unit. That also meant that I couldn't visit her. Right before we left, which I was practically forced into doing so, we spoke with one of the doctors that had been treating her. He said that she was still alive but barley and it was more or less up to her to pull through this. My dad practically yelled out that she was strong and could get through this. Everyone there, especially those who knew him, was surprised by his outburst, including me.

When we made it back at Jesse's, we turned on to the news channel right away. There was a report on the explosion and it seemed these reporters knew more about the situation than the ones that should have known, us. They said that it seemed there was treachery brewing in the preventer's base. People had been giving up on the idea of peace and had been looking for a different side to be on, a winning side, so it seemed. Their first goal was to take out the preventer's base and hopefully all the people in there. They were almost fully successful. They had reported that they have declared war on Earth and some of the colonies. It also seemed they had been secretly building mobile suits, which gave them a major upper hand in this war. It wasn't known what was planned next for this new movement, but it definitely wasn't going to be good. The final thing the reporter said was the name of this new group of terrorists, the "Peace Takers". 

I had the stupid idea then of mentioning something, "What about the Gundams? Wouldn't they be able to beat this new group without any problem?" I had stupidly asked. My response was a long pause followed by my dad saying, "It seems that those Gundams had been self destructed and the pilots' whereabouts are unknown." The TV was turned off and no one spoke much after my question. We all went to bed soon after that but I doubt anyone had much sleep, if any. I know I didn't. I was awake turning and tossing in bed until about 5 a.m. when somehow sleep finally came to me. I awoke a few hours later with a bad dream that turned out to be my sad new reality.

When I got out of bed and stumbled into the kitchen area I was surprised to see Duo already awake and on the phone and my dad sitting at the table drinking coffee. I rubbed my eyes a few times and sat down at the table with my dad. I grabbed the coffee from my dad when he put it back on the table and took a few sips. He gave me a slight glare and took the coffee back.

"So…who's Duo talking to at this time of day?" I asked my dad glancing at the chatting Duo.

"Do you remember Quatre? You met him a few years back, when you were about 10 or something." My dad said taking a few more sips of his coffee.

I remembered Quatre, he was probably the nicest person I'd ever met. I also remembered he was some important, like a Prince or something. Everyone kept calling him "Master Quatre". When my mom introduced me to him he said he still couldn't believe that my dad had a kid. Sometimes I couldn't believe that, either. "The blonde guy? Ya, I saw him when I was 11 at that reunion Hilde held. Duo's on the phone with him? Why?" 

"You'll see when he gets here, he's on a colony at the moment and he probably won't get here until late afternoon. Duo has also talked to Trowa, Wufei, and," Heero made a slight flinch, "My brother-in-law, Miliardo."

"Ah, O.K. then, and why did Duo call all of these people? Another reunion or something?" I wondered knowing my suggestion wasn't the right answer. 

"I told you, wait until everyone arrives." Heero went to take another sip of his coffee then realized it was empty and put it on the counter, "I'm…I'm going to the hospital, are you going to come to?"

He stuttered on his words, he never does that. He always says what he wants to say and that's it. He doesn't speak out anything with emotion; his voice is always the same. He was hurting, too. "No, I have some things to clear up. You be sure to tell mom I said hi, O.K.?"

My dad nodded and got up to head to his car. I grabbed a slice of bread and a jacket and then headed in a different direction. Right before I closed the door behind me I could have sworn I heard Duo say the word "Gundam".

*                        *                        *            

I was walking down a street a few blocks away from Jesse's house. I had a whole afternoon and the rest of the mourning to be out. I kinda felt guilty about leaving Jesse back at the house. I know she would have wanted to come with me, wherever I was going. I didn't want her to come with me, though. I wanted to be alone for as long as I could, it was going to get busy when everyone arrives. 

I looked up and turned to the direction of where the preventer's base once stood. I could still see some smoke rising from the pile of wreckage. _So there may be a new war starting, I thought to myself, W__hat's going to happen? My thoughts wondered in circles for longer than I realized. When I checked my watch after coming out of my dazed state, it said 12:34. I had been wandering aimlessly for a few hours now. I looked around, not knowing for sure where I was. I seemed to be in an alley. There was a lot of garbage on the ground and this place was obviously dirty. I noticed the graffiti on the wall, there was one message on there that grabbed my attention the most. It read, " Peace Sucks, War Rules!!" The person who wrote that was a blind fool._

A noise caught my attention, it sounded like someone just stepped into the ally. I turned abruptly and came almost face to face with a group of leather-wearing punks. They all had the same goofy grin on their face. If I said there was not a single ounce of fear in me at that moment, I would be lying.

"So, what's a nice girl like you doing in an alley like mine?" One of the punks asked, probably their "leader". He was wearing leather pants and a leather vest and he wasn't wearing anything underneath the vest. He also had a necklace with a cross around his neck and he had a tattoo on his arm of a skull with a dagger in it's teeth.

"I'm sorry," I answered trying to sound strong, "I didn't realize I was wandering into this alley, my mind was elsewhere."

"Well, don't ya know there's a toll fer comin' into my alley?" No shirt asked with a grin I should have slapped him for having. I didn't wait to hear for what the price was, I was getting out of there. I swerved my way past the leader and hoped the other lackeys would let me pass. I wasn't all that lucky. 

"In a rush, aren't we?" No shirt said shaking his head, "Maybe I should slow ya down." I was scarred before, now I was terrified. I made a run for the entrance of the alley. No luck, one of the guys grabbed my arm. I tried to break free but he had a tight grip. Self defense time, I kicked the guy right where no guy ever wants to get kicked. He let go of my arm like I figured he would. The rest of the group didn't like this outburst of stubbornness. It was the middle of the day, I figured if I screamed, someone was bound to do something. Even though I'm not much of a screamer, you wouldn't have guessed if you'd heard me then. And just my luck, guess who came peeking into the entrance of the alley? My best friend, of course, just so she could get herself caught up in this, too. She screamed also when she saw the situation that I was in. Thankfully, Jesse has a strong fighting spirit and she wasn't going to let anything bad happen to either of us. She punched the first guy that came near her and he fell straight to the ground. If I hadn't been terrified out of my mind, I would have probably thought that was funny. But Jesse or not, I was still in trouble, there's was no way she could take out all of the guys. My luck hadn't run out yet, though. The next person to come running into the alley was another guy, older than me and Jesse, and I was hoping these punks, too. They decided they might as well not take their chances and split, leaving me there being so thankful to God I may have gone religious. 

Jesse ran up to me and hugged me so tight I thought I would die from lack of air. She was shaking, she must have been more scared than she looked, I realized that I was shaking with her. I just then remembered the guy who entered the alley and knew I had to thank him. I hoped he was still there so I could and when I looked over my shoulder, he was still standing there, looking like he was waiting for us to catch up to him. That was when I realized that I recognized him. I was too scarred before to realize it, but now it was hard to mistake him, he was my cousin, Jack.

It was over a year since I last saw him, he hadn't changed to much since then. He was a bit taller. His blonde bangs still covered a lot of his face and his hair still reached close to his shoulders. His blue eyes looked at me with relief. I just realized now how much like his father he looked. He was, if I'm not  mistaken, 19 now. 4 years older than Jesse and I. Once I was able to get out of Jesse's deadly hold, I ran up to Jack and gave him a big thank you hug. I had enough alone time, I was ready to deal with a swarm of old acquaintances now. 

                                    *                      *                      *

The three of us decided not to tell anyone what had happened in the alley. Jesse and Jack were out looking for me. Jesse probably just went so she could spend more time with Jack. She's had a crush on him ever since she was little and she first met him. It used to just be a bit of puppy love but now she still likes him, I was never sure whether he liked her back or was just polite to her. 

It was a few more hours before everyone else arrived. Once everyone was there, it was hard to hear your voice over everyone else's talking. Everyone was talking about the bomb and the new threat. Almost everyone gave their  condolences to my dad and me. I was really just waiting for everyone to be quiet so my dad could explain what the big secret was to me and everyone else. With all the talking that was happening, I doubted that anyone would shut up anytime soon.

I glanced over, bored, at the swarm of kids bouncing around my uncle. Somehow he had survived his wife, Lucrecia Noin, having 6 kids. Jack was the only one older than me and the rest's ages were younger. The youngest kid was half a year old.

Jesse's mother had also brought out her 2 and a half month old baby. He slept almost every minute of the day and with all this excitement, he would be fussy tonight when everyone else would be trying to sleep. I was already sorry for Jesse who wouldn't be getting any sleep tonight. I probably would be staying over again tonight, too, I was also sorry for myself.

Quatre was there with his followers, the ones that I remember always calling him "Master". I also saw Trowa with his older sister, Catherine. Wufei was there with his wife, Sally, and his two sons. I'd never really liked that black haired guy much and I couldn't figure out how Sally put up with him. I also noticed Dorothy, I remembered hearing that my mom and her used to be pretty close. I could never figure out why, they seemed to different and I never could stand her much. Her eyebrows scare me quite a bit, too.

What caught my attention the most was Lady Une with her adopted daughter, Mariemaia. Lady Une also worked at the preventer's base but she was lucky enough to have been elsewhere when the bomb blew up. I couldn't help but feel a bit angry towards her, it was like she cheated out of her fate while my mom is struggling to survive. 

I stopped studying everyone when I heard Duo call for attention. I was so glad he was doing this so I could finally know what's really going on. It took awhile for everyone to stop talking completely but when they finally did, Duo cleared his throat and started talking, "I know you've all heard about the explosion and the new group that has been threatening us now. I also know all of you have been wondering what we are going to do about the problem at hand. Well, let me give you a bit of an idea as to what we can do. You see, me and some close friends of mine, including Heero, have been secretly working on building a new Gundam privately. We have kept it underground and no one else seems to have known about it. We know that it may seem like we are against peace, but it was really just a safety precaution, as you see now."

This caused some more loud talking among everyone in the room. I didn't start talking, though. I was too busy trying to make sense of what I just heard. Duo said that he was in on building a Gundam, meaning he had experience with this sort of thing. But how…

"Let me finish, would ya?" Duo said using his hands to motion for everyone to be quiet. "As I was saying, we DO have a Gundam for us to use. We also have a few mobile suits that were recovered and fixed and hidden with the Gundam. This gives us a fighting chance. The only problem is, we're not sure who exactly should be piloting the suits. We're all very inexperienced from not having to fight in many years, and we're also not as young as we used to be…"

I was ready to get up and yell out what does he mean they used to pilot Gundams, but Jesse beat me to it. "Dad, have you gone crazy?! Are you saying YOU used to be a Gundam pilot??" She yelled loud enough that people 2 blocks down could hear her scream.

"Well, I hate to have to tell you this now, hun, but we actually are the Gundam pilots, believe it or not." Duo said with a hint of guilt in his voice.

I looked over at my dad, he still had his mask on. It all seemed to make sense now. That's why he always acts so serious; he was probably trained really well to be a pilot of a Gundam. That also reminded me of something I heard years back. Duo once said something to dad and then added "Mr. Perfect Soldier". Then he clasped his hands around his mouth like he just told someone's secret that he shouldn't have. My dad then gave him a long glare and no one talked for the next few hours. I was young then and didn't think too much into it, but I never forgot that scene.

So that's my dad's secret, he's the supposed perfect soldier of the Gundam 01 that I'd heard stories about. My own father, and my father's friends, all of them war heroes that never had their faces in the papers or on the news. My dad had saved the world more than one time. He had played a major role in the war and I had never even had a clue until now.

"I'll pilot the Gundam." My dad said, without any hesitation. 

"Are you sure you're still up for it, Heero?" Duo asked, doubting my dad's sureness. 

"I can do it, I've never gotten sluggish for fighting, unlike you, I'll bet." My dad said as Duo turned around looking somewhat ashamed, "I also know the perfect person to pilot one of the other mobile suits." Heero made a slight glance towards me then turned back to the rest of the crowd, "My daughter, Rya Yuy."

                                    *                      *                      *

Everyone was surprised when my dad volunteered his own daughter to fight in the war, without my approval. Everyone kept asking me if I was sure I wanted to do that, that I didn't have to if I didn't want to. I didn't mind piloting the suit at all. At least this way I could do something for my mom. Besides, this type of thing seemed to be in my blood.

We had gone to the underground place where the suits were being held. My father, Jesse, Jack, Wufei's oldest son and me. They had all volunteered to fight also. Hilde kept trying to convince Jesse not to go but Jesse assured her mom she'd be fine and went anyway. She'd be useful for the fight, she's always had her killer instinct. Jack also volunteered, his parents didn't interfere with his choice of actions. His mom gave him a quick, solemn look, but that was all. His dad seemed to be approving it, on the other hand. Wufei's son, Li, didn't really volunteer like me, his dad convinced him into it. He kept saying it was justified if he went to fight or something like that. 

So there I stood now, looking face to face with the only Gundam in existence today. My dad would pilot that, but just looking at it, I wished I could. I'd seen some pictures in the newspapers and other places of the original Gundams. This Gundam that was made was very similar to the Wing Zero, the same Gundam it seemed my dad used to pilot. There were slight differences like the colors were a bit off and certain parts were in different places or had been removed completely from this model. The main difference in this model was the fact that it wasn't able to go to flight mode. 

Just to the left of the Gundam was where the mobile suit I would be piloting was. I wasn't sure the type it was, I never really knew the types of different suits, but it was definitely cool. I couldn't wait to get inside and give it a test drive, which was why we were there, we needed to learn how to use them. We didn't have very much time to learn how to pilot these; the plan was to attack right away before the Peace Takers can grow too much. 

Duo had joined up with us, he was there to do small mechanical changes to the suits and help us learn to use them. "O.K. everyone, go grab yourself a dancing partner and lets get started." I immediately went for the one to the left of the Gundam, Jesse took the one beside mine. Jack took the one on the other side of the Gundam and Li took the remaining one. 

I entered the cockpit and was a bit overwhelmed when I saw all the buttons in there. For some reason, I thought it would be pretty simple to pilot one of these. I was definitely thinking otherwise now. I know I shouldn't of, but I couldn't resist. I pressed the first button that stuck out at me. A parachute shot out from the back of the suit. 

"RYA!! You weren't supposed to touch anything!!!" Duo shouted at me from over the intercom.

"Oops." Was all I could muster out at the moment. Partly because of how embarrassed I was of what I did, but mainly because the parachute had knocked into Jesse's mobile suit. She nearly fell ove,r but luckily, the wall broke her fall. Actually, _she broke the wall. "Sorry about that, Jess." _

"O.K., could no one else touch any buttons, please?" Duo's comment just made me turn red even more. I wished my dad wasn't there at the moment.

                                    *                      *                      * 

The rest of our training went pretty smoothly, no one had beaten my stupid move. In fact, what I did was probably the only mistake that occurred, which didn't help me feel any better about it. The main thing we went over, which was probably the most boring, was the safety procedures. Duo made sure we went over those about 50 times. (You think I'm exaggerating, don't you?) Poor Jesse, though, Duo made extra sure that she knew everything about the safety procedures ten times better than any of us, and trust me, _that almost killed her. As far as my dad was concerned, safety precautions weren't even needed. I guess I got off the hook there. _

The only other thing that went wrong the whole time we were there was when the Gundam started to have a bit of a malfunction. Duo said there was still one little bug to be worked out in the Gundam, but he couldn't figure out how to fix it. My dad said it wasn't anything big and it probably wouldn't even make a difference. Just a small spark in the arm area, nothing more.

After we had both taken showers, Jesse and I were sitting in her room together talking. Most of the extra people who had arrived were staying at a nearby hotel, Heero and I were still staying at Jesse's house. "You think so too, right?" Jesse looked at me with a hopeful expression, I knew the answer she wanted to hear was "yes". 

"Sure, ya Jesse, I think you and Jack would make a great couple." I said, not sure if I was really answering truthfully or not.

"Oh!! I know he likes me! Did you see him in the hallway? When he bumped into me? I swear, I felt sparks!" Jesse rambled on with excitement and every know and then I would nod with her. My attention was drifting elsewhere, though. I glanced out the window, there was a beautiful full moon out tonight.

I remembered once when I was younger, Duo insisted one going on a camping trip. He somehow convinced my dad to go too, and surprisingly enough, my mom had found the time to come, too. It was a really fun trip, Jesse and I went into the forest one day and pretended we were lost just for the excitement of it. We weren't really, though. The path was sadly to clear to really get lost on. 

The part of the trip I remembered the most was one night, a full moon out like tonight, when I was sitting under the stars with my mom. We had talked for hours, about nothing in particular, really. I do remember asking her about dad. I asked her if he was always so unemotional, how did she ever know that he actually loved her? Her answer was simple, he has different ways of showing it. Our chat was interrupted when we heard screaming coming from the tents. A snake had crawled into a tent and nearly gave Hilde a heart attack, which Duo thought was really funny.

"The moon sure is pretty tonight, isn't it?" I jerked in surprise when I heard Jesse talking directly to me. "Don't worry, I know you weren't listening to a word I was saying, I don't really mind. So what are you really looking at?"

"I wonder if my mom's awake to see this moon…" I mumbled. The bright expression on Jesse's face lit down and she got a sad, sympathetic look on her face. 

"I…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bother you-"

"No, don't worry, I'm fine, really. I think I'm going to go to sleep now, though. Goodnight." The expression on Jesse's face proved I hadn't tricked her, but she let it go. She crawled into her bed and I tucked myself into my sleeping bag. 

I wished my mom could see this moon.

*                        *                        *

            3 days later, our training was complete. We were expected to be able to fight to our full capability in battle now. We probably weren't able to, though. I had visited my mom again, she wasn't really getting better but she wasn't getting worse. The doctors said if she didn't wake up really soon, she may fall into a comma. They didn't tell me the other part, but I already knew it, if she fell into a comma, she may never wake up again.

            Today was the big day when we were to be sent off to battle. Hopefully to return victorious. Hilde had made us all a very big and healthy breakfast, which was gone in no time. We didn't have long to get ready after that and soon we were back underground with the suits. I jumped into my suit, which I had done a bit of a painting job on, which Jesse persuaded me into doing after she already did hers, and had named it "Hope".

            The controls and buttons were all the same as they were before but for some reason looked different now. I buckled in and started to turn on the suit. Was I scarred at the moment? Probably, probably terrified, but I couldn't feel it at the moment. I think it was from the adrenaline rush. 

            Duo had made an exit for us from the underground, when we exited, there was a ship waiting to carry us to the headquarters of the Peace Takers. When we got there it was just like we had expected, one big building with different wings on wither side of it and security all around. The only security we had to worry about right now were the mobile suits. My dad was to take out the first line of suits, with the help of the rest of us. It was pretty straight forward, destroy as many of the enemy's suits as we could. I had an extra job, though. When security is wearing down and people move away from their spots to join the battle, I had to sneak out of my suit and enter the building unnoticed. From there I had to make my way to the assembly room. A spy had informed us that today there would be a lecture from the head of the Peace Takers. My job was to assassinate that man. 

            It was pretty ironic, I had to worry about being assassinated since I was 6 and now, here I was, about to do it myself. Hilde tried to convince everyone not to let me do it, that my mom wouldn't want me to have this job. I was going through with it anyway. The reason my dad didn't do the job was because he was needed to stay in the Gundam and he was the only one who could pilot it. 

            So there we were, the 5 of us, just waiting to cause havoc. I had overheard Duo saying to some of the others that we seemed to be perfectly ready except for the emotional distress that this experience might cause. He said none of us had ever been trained to do anything really violent, like kill a bunch of people and we may take the experience hard on the battle field. Here we were anyway, a bunch of soon-to-be mental patients or not on the battlefield.

There was a small cool breeze blowing in the area. The breeze made the temperature drop quite a few degrees but otherwise it was a beautiful day. There were birds singing and cheeping and squirrels digging for whatever food they could find. And we were about to ruin this beautiful day.

"If any of you don't want to go through with this, now is the only time you have left to say so." My dad said calmly. No one said anything. "O.K., move out. I'm going in first. When I take out a fair amount of suits, the rest of you join in. Rya, I'm sure you remember when you're supposed to enter the building."

"Yes" I answered on the intercom, and with that answer, it was time to start my first ever mobile suit fight. 

As we were cautiously heading forward, something popped in my head. It was something my dad had said to me yesterday. I knew it had to be important because my dad was waiting outside the door of the bathroom when I came out from my shower. He told me just one thing, and it was exactly as follows; "Rya, I know some new and dangerous things are going to happen tomorrow and things may happen that hurt you, not just physically, but I want you to remember this for me; the perfect soldier's daughter shouldn't cry." Those last few words rang in my head like a never ending fire alarm at my school. I promised to do just that. No matter what, I wouldn't cry.

I watched as my dad headed towards the line of mobile suits that he would soon destroy. I saw him prepare his gun to fire. I also saw the mobile suits guarding the place getting ready to fight back. They paused for some time, not sure of what they were seeing, but when my dad took his first shot, they knew exactly what to do. After my dad took out a fair amount of suits, without any damage to his suit, the rest of us moved in. 

The battle in our suits seemed like a blur to me. I remembered continuously pressing the fire button, watching suits blow up due to me. I remember hearing Jesse yelling out in an almost insane battle cry. I remembered realizing enough people had been brought to the battle field and their attention taken away from security that it was time for the second part of the plan. I remembered making my way past the remaining guards, knocking them both out. I remembered glancing back at the battle field one last time to see the fight still raging on and the arm of my dad's Gundam sparking and shots of electricity running up and down it. Then I remembered entering the building and preparing for what was coming next.

I started to regain my senses while I ran past hallway after hallway, avoiding remaining guards. I tired not to, though, I knew it would only distract me. I somehow made it to the balcony of where the assembly was taking place barley noticed at all.

I looked around the auditorium, the seats were all almost full, I approximated over 500 people. I couldn't believe that many people would consider this group. I zoned in on the man speaking, he was obviously the President, the one I was supposed to assassinate. There was security around him, but they didn't even glance at where I was standing. Still, I hid behind the curtains a bit. It seemed they didn't yet realize of what was going on outside. Or maybe they did, they just didn't want the audience to know.

I pulled out the gun I had been given, light seemed to reflect of the smooth surface. My dad had given me some extra training after the suit training for my aim with this gun. I would only have one shot, and if I missed, all our efforts would be for nothing. 

I aimed my gun towards the man at the podium. I used all my effort to stop my hand from shaking, to keep my emotions kept deep down. For some reason I glanced quickly at the railing, I could see a reflection of myself on the bar. I could see my face, and what I saw scarred me. The look, the expression on my face, looked identical to the mask my dad always wore. _Have I __turned into the perfect soldier?_

I wiped the thought from my mind, I wiped away all thoughts and aimed the gun once more. The shot was so clear I doubted I could really miss my target. Still, I found it next to impossible all the same. When the gun was pointed directly at him, I wanted to close my eyes then shoot. I knew that I couldn't, though. I put my finger over the trigger, kept my emotions pushed down and fired.

_BANG._

                                    *                      *                      *

I somehow found my way to back outside where my friends were waiting for me. Each step felt much lighter now, and much heavier at the same time. When Jesse saw me she gave me a big smile. I couldn't help but notice something fake in the smile. "Did you…?"

"Yes, Jesse, yes. I did." The bullet had gone straight through his chest he had died almost instantly, I could hardly believe I had actually done it. _No more, I thought, __No more killing, ever! I think I knew exactly what Duo was talking about right now. I had killed, help me, I had killed! Murdered, assassinated. And somewhere deep down I felt proud._

Jesse's smile faded and no one else smiled at me, I then noticed someone was missing from the group, "Where's my dad?" I asked, "Is he still fighting?" I looked over their faces, each one more gloomy looking then the last, when I looked at Jesse, tears started to stream down her face. 

"I'm sorry, Rya!! I'm so sorry! The Gundam, it…The malfunction, it wasn't a little thing after all." Jesse choked on her words, "The arm, it blew up. Heero…he…he was shot out of the cockpit and landed on…he…he 's been rushed to the hospital by the plane we took, he'll be there in no time!" Jesse's voice started to become frantic, you could plainly see her shaking. She fell to her knees crying and muttering incoherent phrases, I made out only a few words. "Killed!! No, I didn't do it!" and, "Whose fault? Whose?" Jack helped her up and she clung to him, crying more. _"They're perfectly ready for fighting, except for the emotional distress this might cause."_

Jesse was taking this experience really hard. Jack tried not to show it, he tried to be strong so Jesse didn't feel worse, but the grim look on his face showed he wasn't proud of what he had done, either. Li tried to look indifferent, almost like justice had been served, but I could tell he didn't like what he did at all, either. 

As for me, I just stood there, with an unreadable look on my face. If I let my emotions surface, I would be almost no different than Jesse. I wouldn't cry, if my dad was here, he'd tell me not to, and if he found out later, he'd not be happy that I did. I kept up my mask, my dad's mask. My emotions didn't show and I didn't cry.

When we were finally being picked up to go home, Jesse was still somewhat of a wreck but had calm down a bit. Jesse looked at me for a split second and I read the words that she was mouthing out at me, "Perfect Soldier."

            *                      *                      *                      *                      *

A sunny day, that's the kind of day it was one week later. Everyone had gathered again for what seemed to be the last reunion we would ever have. Everyone was there, my mom, my dad, and all our friends. No one had the slightest bit of a smile on their face, almost no one spoke. 

After the battle we had had, the Peace Takers had been defeated, or at least the group. Their leader was gone and almost all of their mobile suits, they had nothing left. But peace takers will always be out there, people who, no matter what, will never believe in peace. Although we had come out victorious, none of us felt that way. 

Jesse still hasn't regained herself, crying almost all the time, never smiling. Her mom's ready to go out any day and buy her pills. She's blaming herself for everything bad that has ever happened to anyone she knows, even if she wasn't even involved with it. Her dad has been blaming himself for the malfunction in my dad's suit. He believes it's fault for letting the malfunction go when he knew it was there. _You did nothing wrong, Jesse, don't blame yourself. Duo, it wasn't your fault. Even if my dad knew it would have happened, he would have gone anyway._

Jack has been acting noticeably different he's been trying to act like a saint, as if acting perfect and helping people will make up for what he's done. _That won't help, it will just make you feel worse about yourself._

Li refuses to show his emotions, for his dad's sake. That's just like what I've been doing. _That's right, keep up the mask, don't feel anything bad about what's happened. Don't feel._

My mask hasn't dropped once yet, if it does, I fear I won't be able to get it back. That's what's worried everyone the most, and I don't think it's helped Jesse any. Hilde frowns whenever she looks at me and Jesse usually starts crying. It doesn't bother me, though, it can't. It won't. _Perfect Soldier._

Birds flew from tree to tree above me, I heard their songs. I think they were there to try and cheer people up by singing, thinking it to help those who have lost people they've loved. I saw one bird land on the tombstone and start singing there, it's song was for us. I looked over the lettering and read it silently, "Heero Yuy and Relena Dorlain. Born and died fighting for peace. One for making the peace exist, the other for upholding it." 

I had wondered about the inscription, who was the one who made it, and who was the one who kept it? I looked down at the single white rose in my hand, it was a perfect rose. Each petal perfect and beautiful. I looked around the crowd once more. Jesse was crying again, Hilde and Jack were trying to comfort her but it was of no use. Other were giving their respects, and some were acting as if nothing was bothering them. 

Jesse had lied to me, or at least not told me the full truth. When my dad was shot out of the cockpit, he landed on his head and died instantly, he didn't have the chance to survive. Later, when I went to the hospital, I learned that my mom had died right around the same time my dad had. It could have been the exact same moment.

I placed the rose down on the grave, I was surprised when I saw a single tear fall onto one of the petals, it was mine. More started to stream down my face and I could no longer stop it, I couldn't keep my mask on.

The perfect soldier's daughter shouldn't cry. But I did, dad. I did. 


End file.
